Ilya

We’ve already shared several stories with you about our colleagues who have their own challenges or who help their children through the difficulties they’re facing. There are also times in our lives when the people who took care of us in the past – our parents – call upon us for assistance. This is what happened to Ilya two years ago, and it divided his life into a before and after stage.

Ilya’s mother trained as a garment factory supervisor, but she sometimes took on other jobs too. She’s worked in sewing factories and workshops, and as a concierge and cleaner at various points. Sometimes, she would work three jobs at once.

“Her life was tough, of course. Even during university she pretty much worked three jobs. Perhaps she already had this disease and just hadn’t been diagnosed because there weren’t any symptoms,” Ilya says.

His mother was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. “Unfortunately, it’s incurable. People who have it fade away gradually and irreversibly. This happens because the immune system causes the myelin sheath that coats the nerves in the brain and spinal cord to slowly break down. There are therapeutic treatments, but they don’t always work. It’s a question of luck.”

The serious diagnosis was made in 2012. She was registered as disabled, first as group III, then II, and finally I. After a certain point, Ilya’s mother became completely dependent. She was no longer able to move around her own apartment without assistance. Ilya and his wife began to supervise his mother at all times, taking turns to go into work. Fortunately, the hybrid work format meant that Ilya was able to do his job as a programmer from home two days a week. His life completely revolved around home and work, with no exceptions. From time to time, his mother needed hospital treatment and then the usual schedule changed a little.

On top of Ilya’s mother’s multiple sclerosis, dementia set in and her short-term memory almost completely disappeared. Ilya had to repeat the same things to her again and again.

In spring this year, Ilya’s mother passed away. She was a little over 60. It’s believed that her death was hastened by severe pneumonia. “I still wonder whether I did everything I could or if I missed something,” Ilya says. “I know you can’t undo what’s already happened, but it’s important for me to know that I did everything I could.”